How to get iPhone 5 and iPad to "talk" to each other

Big long complicated story. Thanks in advance for any help and advice you can offer!

 

So my partner's old computer up and died on us recently. He blames iTunes, as we experienced a TON of issues when he wanted to relocate iTunes from the C:\ drive to a different hard drive on the computer. Long story short, he has now in essence forbidden me from installing iTunes on the new computer that just arrived last night. So I have an issue now.

 

I run both an iPhone 5 and an iPad. Usually, I would use iTunes to transfer information between the two, for example new music purchased on one device. I used iTunes to manage my playlists and music (etc) and would then sync both devices so that they, in essence, matched. Now I am not allowed to put iTunes on the computer, as my boyfriend is convinced it will kill it like our last one. (Side note: I think the computer died because it is an almost-3-yd-old gaming computer that was never properly shut down but always left to "idle", and it often ran too hot. But I'm a girl, so what do I know right?)

 

In the past I have tried using iTunes Match to get my devices to talk to each other outside of iTunes, which worked great! Except that because the music files are not actually stored on my phone it means that my stereo deck in my car cannot play any music on my iPhone. As I work out of town sometimes and have to drive 4 to 5 hours by myself, this is an issue.

 

So I really need a solution to one of the following:

1) A way to use iTunes Match AND have my car play the music on my iPhone (it's a deck where you just plug the USB cord from iPhone to deck).

2) A way to get my devices to communicate to each other without using iTunes.

3) A way to convince my boyfriend that iTunes will NOT kill the computer and that I am allowed to install and use it. (I also had the thought that if I can install and use iTunes on an external hard drive, I am okay with this method as well, but again, it needs to NOT kill the computer.)

 

Thanks for any help and advice! I know it's a confusing and complicated situation.

 

Oh, PS: Pretty sure the new computer is running Windows 7, but I haven't been on it yet so it might be running Windows 8?... It's a new Alienware gaming computer, if that makes any difference to the above.

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Not only that, the bunch of apps I selected to download has, aside from the first 3 or 4, completely stopped getting downloaded. That is the spinning circle indicator on the top left is no longer showing.

 

The odd thing was when I selected another new app to be downloaded, that one did get downloaded but none of those left waiting to be downloaded is getting downloaded - or at least none of them has the % completion bar showing any change (all blank or 0%).

 

The Genius for App is turned off already - has been so as far as I can remember. Settings->Privacy->Location Services is not turned on for app store. Oddly, everytime app store is launched for the first time after reboot the GPS/navigation indicator does show *BRIEFLY* on the top right of the screen.

 

I have rebooted the ipad multiple times by either holding down just the top right hand button on the back, or holding both that button & the home button until the apple icon shows.

 

I have also rebooted my router multiple times. Internet access from ipad is clearly working as webpages get loaded. Speedtest.net shows download speed avg 0.8Mbps.

 

I would have tried to clear out all those apps still waiting to be downloaded & re-select them to see if that might work. However I don't see a method for doing that.

 

Any ideas? Thanks.

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Two missions: First trying to consolidate multiple libraries within my family.  Have iTunes on laptop (windows xp) with 55GB of music on it which is sync'ed with sons iPod and my iPod.  Also have a iPad which my husband has bought a good amount of music on.  Will I lose all of his purchases if I sync the iPad with my iTunes library?  Should I burn CD's from his iPad (can you do this) then reimport them into my iTunes library??

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THANKS Techie folks!!

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